As I sit and begin to think about my walk as a believer, there was never a time that I could say that I did not have trials.From losing loved ones,migrating to a foreign country and finding out who I really was in God were all challenging.I have encountered some holes but it was not meant for me to remain in those holes.I know that nothing great is ever accomplished without a few challenges along the way. Sometimes you probably feel the same way and ask why do I have to go through certain things?
I am reminded that when I gave my life over to God, that meant that He can do whatever He wants because I could not run my life any more.Literally, that means that I, Lorneka,can no longer call the shots and I must deny all my rights.To my amazement, I didn't know how or when this was going to happen, but let me tell you that its taking place at great extents.
Don't get me wrong I am not saying that God only gives me seasons of pain and trials, there have been many days of spring.But first,He had to bring to the end of myself.Last night as I was getting ready for bed,this analogy came to me.When we become Christians and confess our sins,its like you had a key to a door, it only was able to fit when you forced it to work and that was only for a short period of time that it stayed open. From time to time I would take the key and make it work when I wanted to,but God is saying to let Him hold the key and let Him open it when He wants to,the way He wants and how He wants to.Also when He opens it no man or woman can close it. Now that I have given him access and the password to my life which is JESUS- there is no more manipulation and life is grand!!!!
I am to the point in my life where I have to encourage myself constantly in order to remain strong in the Lord. Is it a fight? Yes it is, but I AM victorious.Let us remember that before Jesus was called to the cross he endured some disturbing things.But like Him,I don't want a few bumps to stop me from where I am going. Whatever tests you're going through,know that "everything is working out all for your good." As we speak, God is using his key to allow my family to not understand me and what I believe;He is allowing people to lie on me and to not defend myself;tasks on my job to becoming complex to see what I will do. In doing so,He is waiting to see if I will quit or believe his word for my life.I already know where I want to go but He knows the right paths.
To get there, I must go through. Where is there?
1) For me, there is..to become a radical woman of God, I must go through as a Christian.
2) To minister and disciple others, I must first be discipled and mentored by someone who knows how to disciple and take correction when necessary.
3) To get to pharmacy school and become a pharmacist, I must go through on my job as a technician and carry out someone else's vision.
4) To become a wife, I must be challenged and proven in relationships with loyalty, trust,dedication and be able to submit to all my authorities NOW.
5) To get to the place where the opinions of men don't matter,He will first has cause people to use and abuse me and see how I handle it.
6) To become a wealth,He must first see how I can budget a monthly salary,decipher between needs and wants or when sacrifice is needed.
7) To become a leader, I must be able to first take some pressure from others(which I am experiencing now), stand up for others, get lied on, help others when it's not convenient for me and even do the word of God even when it does not make any sense.For the bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 1:27"But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty;...."
So whatever God has you going through now,you and I need to realize its not a hop and skip away.There is a process we all must go through.I live and dwell on the fact that my life is no longer mine and I must say YES to His will even when it hurts. .
So if you have given Him the key and keep taking it back because you don't like the way things are going, give it back and tell Him right now "NEVERTHELESS, NOT MY WILL BE DONE, BUT YOUR WILL."(luke 22:42). All He wants is a yes from you and I.I have decided to say yes now what about you?
Please feel free to leave comments or email your questions to ladylorneka@gmail.com
